Monday, July 15, 2013

Movie Season

     So I'm going to throw this out there and I know some of you will find it hard to believe. I am a man, living in the South, and I don't like college football. There, I said it. It just does not do anything for me. All the the things surrounding it seem pretty awesome, it just isn't my bag.
     I was talking with some friends last night about this and it got me thinking. I wish there was a set season for something that I really enjoyed and cared about. Give me a good stretch, maybe three or four months, where I can cram in all my enjoyment, entertainment, etc and then discuss, lament, plan, etc the rest of the year.
     Then it hit me: I wish there was a movie season, a season where directors would release their new films each Saturday to be watched, judged, compared, etc. I would grill, make fantastic dips, drink copious amounts of  beer, have an awesome time and then count the hours during the week until the next Saturday.
     Planning an event during movie season? There better not be an important movie that day. "You are getting married on the 17th? I know I am your best man and all...but Scorsese is playing." Your function location better have a big screen tv and a killer sound system or your guests will either hate you or won't show at all. By the way, if my favorite director does not do a good film that day, you can be prepared for me to ruin your party with a terrible attitude about the movie for the rest of the day...and maybe even the whole week after.
     I will buy hats and shirts with my favorite director on them and might even wear them both at the same time. I'll have all sorts of merchandise and branded products and I'll probably even wear or display them in the off season. I will talk with other fans of my director about which actors he is recruiting. If my director has a serious rival, I will talk endless smack about them and their fans. I will also have merch that talks smack. I will hope and pray that their film is not as good as my director's and that they do poorly in the season.
     I will tailgate at movie theaters the day of the film's premier. If I don't have a ticket, I will think it is perfectly acceptable to pay many, many times above the ticket's face value to get one. I will see strangers in public wearing my director's merch and greet them with quotes from his films. I will have a song from the soundtrack as my ring tone. I will name my children after a character from the film. I will harshly judge others by their choice of director.
     Man, I am really excited now. I'm ready...really ready. Movie season cannot get here soon enough.


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